Let Me Introduce Myself...

     My name is Emily. I am a 28 year old female living in Tennessee. I am married to an amazing man, Brad. I am a nurse, while he is a pharmacist. We have been married now for almost 8 years. We met in high school and have been together ever since. We stuck it out together through the end of high school, being separated by distance in college not once, but twice, and both studying ALL the time! He is truly my best friend. Through the years our family has grown...we now have 4 dogs (yes I said 4) and identical twin boys on the way. Our dogs have been our children and good practice for these boys about to make their entrance into this world.

     I love the life we have created and the future that is almost upon us. However, the road to this point has not been easy.  These little boys, you see, are truly miracles from God. We spent 1 1/2 long, frustrating years trying to get to this point of starting a family.  We learned so many lessons during this time: most importantly, that God has a time for everything and His plan will always supersede any plans we have for our life or future.  It is not easy to have faith, however, when you want something so bad for so long.  Although this was a time of immense pain and frustration, God showed His love for the two of us by bringing us even closer together in love and friendship. Let me share some of our journey over the last 2 years with you...

     Summer 2011 Brad and I decided we were finally comfortable and confident in trying to start a family. At this point we were both accomplished and secure in our careers, had a modest home almost completely furnished, family surrounding us, and a love for each other stronger than ever.  We both have always been healthy individuals with no major medical problems of any kind. So, we knew we wouldn't have any difficulty getting pregnant and starting a family...boy were we wrong! After 7 months of trying (now we are at February 2012), hoping and praying and being let down each time, I thought I might finally be pregnant. So I called my doctor and went in to see if my prayers had come true...

     Well, as I'm sure you guessed, I was not :(  My doctor had me go through the motions and do a test in the office as well as some lab work.  The lab work came back showing that I was not even ovulating. So, I went back to the doctor for an ultrasound. This showed that I have PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome). Basically, there is an imbalance in the sex hormones produced, causing irregular periods and making it much more difficult to get pregnant.  I was put on Progesterone to try and regulate my periods and help figure out when I would be ovulating. After 2 months, my periods started being predictable. So, my doctor gave us the option of trying Clomid. Clomid is an oral medication used to stimulate hormones needed for ovulation and the release of eggs. We wanted to be proactive, so we decided to try it. After 3 months of taking the Clomid, we were still disappointed from not getting pregnant. (Now we are in June 2012). At this point, I was sent for a hysterosalpingogram or HSG.  This lovely procedure is performed to check for blockages, growths, etc. on the fallopian tubes.  Basically,  radiography dye is injected into the uterine cavity. If the tubes are open, they fill up with the dye, which the radiologist can see on the screen. If they are closed, however, the dye will go into the abdominal cavity. Although this was a very unpleasant experience, the test turned out completely normal.
     So, it was nice to know that there were no problems with my fallopian tubes, but it was as equally frustrating that we still weren't pregnant. Emotionally, this was a very hard time for me. I don't think I would have been able to continue through this grueling process if I didn't have my husband.  He is such a good man to me. He was always there to wipe my tears and just hold and comfort me when we got the negative news month after month after month. And he always made a point to go with me and hold my hand for each appointment and procedure. 
     Since my procedure was normal, it was Brad's turn to be tested. His procedure was equally as uncomfortable and nerve-racking as mine, but he is such a strong person that he held his head high and got through it.  So, his results were all normal as well. Now what do we do?? My doctor had us try 3 more months with the Clomid. (Apparently, there is a higher chance of the woman getting pregnant after the HSG "cleans out the tubes".)  Well, now we were in August 2012, one year of trying to get pregnant. The only option we had left before being completely referred to a specialist was an IUI (Intrauterine Insemination).  For this procedure, I had to monitor strictly for the day I ovulated. The day after that happened was crucial. We had to go and have a "sperm wash" on Brad's sample and take it to my doctor who placed this directly into my uterus. The hope is that pregnancy will occur by being directly in contact with the uterus.  So, we said a prayer and went through yet another procedure.  As usual, this was negative :(  This was one of the hardest times, because we were so hopeful and just knew that this procedure would be the one to get me pregnant. 
     One more round of this procedure was done with yet again another negative. I was an emotional wreck, I know, but my husband was so good to me and happily offered a kiss or a shoulder for me to cry on. He is truly an amazing person to me. I don't know if he will ever understand what his constant presence and love meant to me during this journey.  
     Well, now we were in October 2012. At this point, we were both so tired of the procedures, following the days of my period to the tee, and being told when we could have sex and when we couldn't. So, we decided to just take the rest of the year off of the pressure and just enjoy the holidays together. The new year would be a time of major decisions of adoption vs. being happy without children for a while.  Of course during this whole process we would find out month after month that someone else we knew was pregnant or having a baby.  Although I was happy for each couple to get to experience the joy and gift of children, my heart broke each time I heard this announcement.  I continued on and helped my mom and a friend of my sister plan and host a baby shower for my sister. She was due to have a little girl in January. I actually enjoyed myself at her shower and was genuinely happy for her on that day in November, despite being disappointed with my period showing up that morning before the shower.
     Thanksgiving came and it was helpful to spend time with family and friends. On we moved to December. Brad and I were still convinced that it just wasn't meant for us to get pregnant at this time.  Little did we know that God had a special plan for us that was just getting started...